Is Sex Work Immature?

No. To determine that all sex workers rock that juvenile vibe is to isolate us from other professionals. The reality is that sex work gets deconstructed by those who either have never done it or who refuse to examine it from an educated perspective to include a conversation about sex, in itself and sex, in general. First of all, my impression of those who simply reduce sex work to a childish pursuit do it, so they can feel better about themselves, because they may have some insecurity about their own choices with regard to vocation, life decisions, or their lives in totality. They attack us, because they feel it, also threatens the very foundations they build their lives upon that include marriage to one person, owning a home, and having children. The truth is, though, that I never force anyone to live as I do. It is the other way around. Their lack of tolerance amounts to ignorance. Comparisons are odious, as has been said, and when they are made, they alienate us by immediately forcing us into two categories: traditional workers and sex workers. I am no alien. I am a woman who does online sex work. I, also feel as if people who have never done sex work believe that since (and this is an assumption) I do not classify myself within a rigid political construct or ally myself with one religious group that I must be lazy, because I do not embrace a single philosophy. What I choose to do is examine all political and religious beliefs and keep an open mind. What this may represent is a threat to those who like believing in one ideology or who have friends who like a specific group, for example, I like punk rock or jazz. I prefer to try to understand many ideals or doctrines, and this is peculiar to sex work, specifically, because I talk to different men who have varied interests. Sex work, itself is outside the norm, which suits me, also because I enjoy subverting the dominant paradigm. Many feel this statement is erroneous, because people who consider themselves to be doing that very thing, generally dismiss sex work as yet another example of American culture that objectifies women, and they firmly believe that it is always wrong to do such. That is like saying, it is wrong to be attracted to anyone, or that museums are offensive. That kind of rigid adherence to one discipline is what gets most people in trouble. There is simply no one set of beliefs that is always right. A healthier way to live is to acknowledge diversity. It is why British Parliament is so venerated. If the Jews were to imagine that God is responsible for the Holocaust, because he was punishing them, in this same way, therefore, we must reject Judaism, entirely or in part. I liken it to forcing a square peg into a round hole. It will never work to try to apply one construct to everything. You will always fail, because what we have to do is deconstruct anything and everything, instead.

What the hell does any of this have to do with sex work being infantile? It does not, because unless you open your mind to all ways of thinking, you will not find common ground. My judgment, therefore is that the statement that sex work is done only by those who have never examined their own motivations is the same thing. Those who do it, either have lived a life full of their own un-examined motives, or they are just contrarians. I, of course am making the assumption that all religious people must believe only in a literal translation of the bible, and I know this is not true, either. I am speaking about those who feel uncomfortable thinking outside the box or feel unsafe when they venture outside their comfort zone, and that may be a lot of people. As I have said, sex work is a solitary pursuit. I, myself do not always feel wonderful doing sex work. It is more difficult than other jobs, because the criticisms directed at us are fierce. Nonetheless, sex work is never just one thing. Sex work is as different as food. It cannot be considered only immature, though. I would prefer that people say, “I have never done it, so I do not know what it is like,” or “I do not want to do it, I can accept that we agree to disagree with regard to life choices.” Of course, I write these words knowing that I may be preaching to the choir or attempting to have a conversation with people who will never indulge me.