Two Years Of Hard Work
I have been doing Cam for about two years, and it is hard work. It is not only physically demanding, but I also have to come up with interesting or funny things to say in an instantaneous, swiftly moving environment. As you can imagine, I am not always able to do this, but I have been complimented on my abilities, because I am honest about even those times when I do not know what to say or do. So, I rely on the news, I ask questions of my guests, and we engage with one another in what seems like an effortless way. In reality, it is draining, time consuming, and sometimes, I lose it. I rail against not only the government but my fans. They love me, still, though, because we are communicating in a safe place with respect to the context. We are all free to curse, lose control, and often apologize to each other. The medium is tolerant of the vast permutations of sex, love, and comedy. I focus on men a lot, because they tend to be very open about their proclivities, neuroses, and work lives. Our interactions run the gamut from politics to scat. They use funny screen names, boldly talk about their interests in bed, and not only do I make them laugh, but I laugh, as well. One night, someone with what must be paranoid schizophrenia came in, and he wrote incoherent statements that I became frustrated by, but I instantly understood that all I needed to do was respond in kind. I wrote back to him various things that sounded similar to what he had said to me, and I knew that I could offer even he something he needed. I get joy from offering each person who comes into my room a unique experience. I do this, because I like diversity of preference. I am a BBW, so that notwithstanding, I give my fans what they request. You could say that I bend too much, I offer too many variations of sex, but I love it. This process also allows me to use a catharsis through performance that enables higher mindedness, continuity, and excitement. So, this is not just about sex. It is about moment to moment thrills involving jokes, real life experiences on both my part and theirs, and often sex.
Recently, I made a recommendation to one of my clients that they put on a mask and try this. It is a lot of fun, sometimes tough because of the harsh criticisms hurled at me, but educational. It will change your view of life, sex, and love. It will open up your mind and body. You can be anyone you want on Cam, and if you try it, I think you will find it spices up your love life, too. You can be as, “out” as you want, so decide for yourself whether you can handle it, but I find it very gratifying. It is something you can brag about at a party, tell your friends about, and it will make them laugh and maybe even consider it for themselves.
It has been two years, and I am tired but still happy I do it. I am also confronting my fears, which helps me work through the mental illness I have. Dealing with fears, real or imagined is healthy, and this is a great way to do it, because I can work from home. I manage to socialize in public, too, so I feel better about that, because there has been heavy criticism of those who rely almost exclusively on online communication. We are not perfect, so this creative outlet is an example of our flawed humanity, but it ain’t bad. I supplement my modest income with Cam, so I still do not make a lot of money, but I feel freer. I am free to use my mind, body, and voice to express myself and interact with lots of cool people. I would not trade this experience for the world.